What I learned on my summer vacation #4

Someone who knows me, Matt, and also Caroline asked the latter when we returned from Paris if she had an dirt on us – “Do they fight?” she wanted to know, “What kind of couple are they really?” Loyal Caroline said that no, we never fought and were a “perfect couple.” (Her words, not mine.)

I of course had to chuckle at this. And never fear; my fourth tip is not “When you travel, try to be a perfect couple, like me and Matt.” No indeed. My tip is this: Be prepared for at least one fight with your significant other.

At some point during the trip, you and your spouse, partner, or what have you will not be able to stand the sight of each other. Now this didn’t happen when Matt and I were in Paris, mostly because we were in Paris, but also because Matt was working and wasn’t around all the time. It also didn’t hurt that Caroline was there to help and that we were going out and drinking a bottle of wine every night. But on family trips, road trips, where you spend hours in the car together, hours in the rental house, cabin, or hotel room together, hours amusing the children together when it rains again, hours when you have to come up with yet another plan of what to do in case it rains, hours were you are not fooling around EVER because the children are always there watching you, you will not escape thinking things like this:

Why is it always up to me to map out our route and get the opening hours right? Hmm? Must you turn on the TV right now? What I wouldn’t give to have some peace and quiet. Oh, thanks for giving the kids another Pop Tart – they’ll never get to sleep now. Haven’t you ever heard about the sugar/hyperactivity connection? Do you really need to sneeze five times in a row? I’m going to hide that remote, I really am. Can I get your attention for five minutes so we can discuss our plan for tomorrow Because if I don’t come up with one, we’ll all be sitting here staring at each other. And that would make me CRAZY!

Mostly Matt and I have a great time when we are on the road together. We both love to be with the boys and we enjoy each other’s company. But it would be dishonest of me not to admit that at least once on every trip we have a spat. Sometimes it might last even an entire day or two. But I’ve learned after years of traveling with Matt, both before and after children, that we will always kiss and make up and then enjoy ourselves. Someone always has to say they are sorry (this time it was me; I had really read him the riot act about making plans as if Little Miss Control Freak was really going to give that up) and someone else always has to make a joke. But then you do and you look across the deck on the first nice evening when you finally get to sit outside and you clink your beer bottles together and enjoy the sunset and realize how lucky you are to be in the place you love with the person you love and all is well in the world.

And for those of you that travel as single parents with young children in particular, I’d like to give you a gold medal, a kiss on the cheek, and a nice cold drink. But I also recommend that when the going gets rough remember that you get to call all the shots and won’t have to argue with anyone about whether you should stop and ask for directions.

If you enjoyed this post, I hope you’ll visit the others in this series:

If you enjoyed this post, I hope you’ll visit the others in this series:

What I learned on my summer vacation #1

What I learned on my summer vacation #2

What I learned on my summer vacation #3

What I learned on my summer vacation #5